Forgiveness is one of the most profound challenges we face. It demands courage, humility, and the willingness to confront pain—both the pain others have caused us and the pain we’ve caused ourselves. If you’ve ever struggled with forgiveness, you’re not alone. I’ve wrestled with it, too, often feeling as though holding on to anger or guilt was safer than letting it go. But here’s what I’ve learned: forgiveness isn’t about excusing someone’s actions, and it isn’t about forgetting. Forgiveness is about liberation—yours.
When someone hurts us, the natural response is to protect ourselves. That might look like holding a grudge or building walls, but the truth is that those actions don’t shield us; they bind us to the very pain we’re trying to escape. Forgiveness, instead, is the process of cutting those ties. It’s not a sign of weakness but of profound strength—a decision to no longer let the harm done to you dictate your future.
Self-forgiveness, though, is often even harder. Acknowledging someone else’s humanity is one thing, but it’s another to look at yourself in the mirror and extend the same compassion. We’re often our harshest critics, replaying our mistakes like broken records. But forgiving yourself doesn’t mean absolving yourself of responsibility; it means allowing yourself the grace to learn and grow.
Forgiveness doesn’t happen all at once. It’s a practice, an ongoing commitment to set yourself free. The peace you’re seeking doesn’t come from erasing the past—it comes from deciding that the past no longer defines you. Through this practice, you unshackle yourself from resentment and move toward peace. So, forgive not for the sake of others but for yourself. You deserve that freedom.